Primetime trailer: Robert Pattinson's Chris Hansen promises to be "bigger than Lost" — with Ari Aster producing
Why don't you have a seat, because A24 just dropped the final trailer for Primetime ahead of its September 25 release, and Robert Pattinson's Chris Hansen is somehow both a perfect impression and a jump scare.
This is the Pattinson career arc working exactly as designed: Batman, then Bong Joon Ho clones, then the single most meme-encrusted voice in American television history, delivered dead-on. The man collects accents like Infinity Stones.
The pitch: television eats a man
Lance Oppenheim — the Ren Faire documentarian making his narrative debut — is not telling a wholesome story about catching bad guys. Based on Luke Dittrich's 2007 Esquire article, the film is about the machine around To Catch a Predator: the ratings, the ambition, the moment a TV stunt and actual law enforcement stopped being distinguishable. The trailer hands its most chilling line to network boss Jeff Zucker: "I don't like your show, but America loves it!" — right before Pattinson's Hansen pumps his fists in a hallway and vows he'll be bigger than Lost. Reader, we all know how Lost ended.
The supporting cast is stacked and slightly unhinged: Merritt Wever as a producer, Skyler Gisondo, Bokeem Woodbine, Anna Faris as Hansen's wife, and Phoebe Bridgers making her acting debut, because A24 is legally required to cast one sad-girl icon per project. Producers include Pattinson himself and Ari Aster, a name that tells you precisely how comfortable this movie wants you to feel.
Venice loved it. Chris Hansen did not.
The film premiered in competition at Venice to a marathon standing ovation, with Pattinson telling the press the role became irresistible after he'd signed on only to produce: "There's something magnetic about his presence," he said of Hansen, whom he studied through thousands of hours of footage.
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The real Hansen, meanwhile, is running his own counter-programming:
- He wasn't involved in the film, has said he always pictured Denis Leary in the role, and declined to watch an early cut because he wouldn't sign the NDA.
- He's called Pattinson's take "overly dramatic" — while admitting his own family thinks the imitation is pretty good, which is the most family thing I've ever heard.
- He's reportedly bought ad time to run before Primetime screenings in theaters. Yes. Ads for himself. In front of the movie about himself.
A film about a man who weaponized television is being counter-attacked by that man, using television ads, inside the theaters showing the film. Oppenheim couldn't have scripted a better third act if he tried.
September 25. Have a seat.
Previously we wrote: Ke Huy Quan gave up his Chinese name at 18
